http://keepmecomfee.blogspot.com/
Please check out my Aunt Shellys blog about Hard Core Parenting.
What she says is so true. Your children listening to you the first time not the second or the third could cost them their lives.When you are at home in you household you think it is safe to give them the old 1,2,3 routine or time out but what happens when you go out in public. They think they get the same three chances but all it take is that one time not listening to you the parent and they are gone or picking up something strange off the floor and placing it in there mouth or even the worst possible situation get hit by a car in the parking lot. This could mean the end of their life. Why because they thought its ok to disobey mommy or daddy two times when they say don't run in the parking lot, hold my hand, stay out of the middle of the street. when in reality the first time they don't listen "WACK" they have been hit. Why did I get hit the child mutter Mommy didn't get to three. I got lucky and so did my son when he was hit by a truck. I got a second chance and so did he. No more one, two, three. Its do or die.
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
Do you have an addiction?
There are several addictions in this world? I have been face with several in my own life time. When you think of addiction what comes to mind. Alcohol, cigerettes, drugs, caffine, or even work, but what about FOOD?
When you are addicted to alcohol you are an alcoholic. You indulge yourself with alcohol on any occation. Many alcoholics don't even know when they have been consumed by this addiction until they have hit rock bottom and lost everything. When an alcoholic is recovering there are many free programs for support that people go through to over come this addiction. And then there are those hidden alcoholics that hide it from everyone and you wouldn't even know. I went through a period in my life that I was consumed by alcohol. My husband and I would party all the time with are friends adn then wake up the next morning with hang overs. We would come up with all sorts of drinking games. I eventually could out drink every person at all the parties that we had and I wouldn't even have a hang over in the morning. We lived to drink and party. I got pregnant with my son and couldn't drink any more this was the end of our party days. I couldn't drink so nobody else could it would make me sick. That was the easy way to recover from being a hidden drinker. After I had Mikey I didn't go back to the heavy drinking I had been doing before, I would just have a drink every know and again. This is when everything in my marraige started to fall apart. I moved to Texas with my husband to try to fix things, but that will be another story for another day; however we stayed their for 6 months and came back to Virginia Beach. Are relationship was still not perfect, but we keep pushing it aside for a rainy day. I would cover my pain with alcohol and drink my pain away. Then one of the worst days in my life happened. It started off as a normal day I went to work that day and my husband and I were supposed to go to a coworkers party afterwards, but we couldn't go together because we had no sitter for the kids. I went by myself. We were having marriage problems at this time so I was ok to go by myself I got a free night. Little did I lnow the unexpected would happen. I was drugged and raped that night. I still don't remember all the details about that night they come to me in bits and pieces at all different times. After 4 1/2 years I still hurt over this night and the choices that I made. After I was raped I don't remember much up until I was sitting in the foriensic lab being pocked and proded at. I felt like I was being raped all over again. I was then given pills for any kinds of STDs that I have may have come in contact with and then i was given a morning after pill. I choose not to take it at the office and then after crying and throwing up I made the choice to take the pills. I don't believe in killing an unborn child no matter how it comes to you but I took these pills and have regreted it ever since. The month after I had a really bad menstral cyle. I don't know wheather that was all or if it was a miscarige. Honestley I didn't want to. I couldn't live with myself if I did. I blame myself for that night and for the events that happened. i made the choices that I did and my fate was made. I didn't think I deserved good things in my life. I pushed my husband away and thought of evey negative thing that I could. I couldn't think of any positive in my life I didn't deserve it. I hurt family when I went to Texas and this was my pay back for choices that I had made in my life. I started to fell like I didn't deserve a good marriage or even my children. I made excusses and blamed my husband for everything bad in our life. I laid in bed at night and kept trying to remember and forget the tradgic details of that night. I found comfort in alcohol and drank when everyone was asleep or I would say I was staying late at work just to go to the bar and have a couple drinks. I thought this would hide the pain. I accused my husband of having an affair just to make it ok to leave him. I couldn't find happiness. 6 months later I moved to my parents and told my husband he couldn't have me back until we went through marriage counseling and parenting classes. We went threw these classes and counseling sections but I still didn't believe that I deserved happiness. For the first time in our marriage we had comunnication. I slowed down my drinking at this point, but I then picked up smoking and I ate and ate. I was over weight before, but I didn't think I deserved better. I still have not bared my real pain of that night what haunts me everyday of my life and what I have a hard time living with. Did I kill a living being. I have forgiven the person who raped me, but I can not seem to forgive myself for taking that pill. There are nights that I stay awake all night long wondering.
Then there is these two addictions that went hand and hand for me smoking and working. I threw myself into my work hoping that I would cover this pain. Finding an excuses to smoke when ever I could. I didn't believe that I would be good enough for my kids. I loved them and always have loved them, but work covered my pain, so I thought. When I almost lost Mikey last year my life turned upside down. a pack of cigs a day. I was Thankful that he was saved and only hasd a few bruises. I didn't understand though Why? how does a 5 year old get hit by a F350 and live to talk about it. I realized God forgave me and my son was very blessed. I still sometime stay up and think about the awful things in my life but I don't work and I don't smoke anymore. I just eat.
My life now couldn't be any better I have two beautiful children that I am lucky enough to home school and a husband who loves me so much I am trying to look at everything in a brighter more positive light. There are those days that I don't think I deserve it and I eat. I have an addiction to Food and it haunts me. I have to get past all my past emotional beggage so that I can be healthy enough to live and see my babies grow up. How do I stop eating when does food stop being comforting. Food has been my addiction since way back and I will find any excuse to eat. I eat when I am happy, sad, lonely and when I don't deserve anything I have.
Today I am getting rid of my emotional beggage and starting my life forgiving myself for this aweful night. I do deserve life. I deserve health and I deserve happiness. I am done being a victim I want my life back. And Food will not run it. "I can do anything with the help of Christ who gives me the strength I need."(Phillippians 4:13)
I am doing this with my loving husband he and I have made a bet with each other to see who looses the most weight. We will weigh each other each week who ever loses the most get a healthy dinner prepared by the other one. I am hoping this is a new beging to my life. Every day is a new day and is a gift thats why it is called the present. Yesturday is history and tomorrow is a mystery but today is a present. I am no longer living in the past.
When you are addicted to alcohol you are an alcoholic. You indulge yourself with alcohol on any occation. Many alcoholics don't even know when they have been consumed by this addiction until they have hit rock bottom and lost everything. When an alcoholic is recovering there are many free programs for support that people go through to over come this addiction. And then there are those hidden alcoholics that hide it from everyone and you wouldn't even know. I went through a period in my life that I was consumed by alcohol. My husband and I would party all the time with are friends adn then wake up the next morning with hang overs. We would come up with all sorts of drinking games. I eventually could out drink every person at all the parties that we had and I wouldn't even have a hang over in the morning. We lived to drink and party. I got pregnant with my son and couldn't drink any more this was the end of our party days. I couldn't drink so nobody else could it would make me sick. That was the easy way to recover from being a hidden drinker. After I had Mikey I didn't go back to the heavy drinking I had been doing before, I would just have a drink every know and again. This is when everything in my marraige started to fall apart. I moved to Texas with my husband to try to fix things, but that will be another story for another day; however we stayed their for 6 months and came back to Virginia Beach. Are relationship was still not perfect, but we keep pushing it aside for a rainy day. I would cover my pain with alcohol and drink my pain away. Then one of the worst days in my life happened. It started off as a normal day I went to work that day and my husband and I were supposed to go to a coworkers party afterwards, but we couldn't go together because we had no sitter for the kids. I went by myself. We were having marriage problems at this time so I was ok to go by myself I got a free night. Little did I lnow the unexpected would happen. I was drugged and raped that night. I still don't remember all the details about that night they come to me in bits and pieces at all different times. After 4 1/2 years I still hurt over this night and the choices that I made. After I was raped I don't remember much up until I was sitting in the foriensic lab being pocked and proded at. I felt like I was being raped all over again. I was then given pills for any kinds of STDs that I have may have come in contact with and then i was given a morning after pill. I choose not to take it at the office and then after crying and throwing up I made the choice to take the pills. I don't believe in killing an unborn child no matter how it comes to you but I took these pills and have regreted it ever since. The month after I had a really bad menstral cyle. I don't know wheather that was all or if it was a miscarige. Honestley I didn't want to. I couldn't live with myself if I did. I blame myself for that night and for the events that happened. i made the choices that I did and my fate was made. I didn't think I deserved good things in my life. I pushed my husband away and thought of evey negative thing that I could. I couldn't think of any positive in my life I didn't deserve it. I hurt family when I went to Texas and this was my pay back for choices that I had made in my life. I started to fell like I didn't deserve a good marriage or even my children. I made excusses and blamed my husband for everything bad in our life. I laid in bed at night and kept trying to remember and forget the tradgic details of that night. I found comfort in alcohol and drank when everyone was asleep or I would say I was staying late at work just to go to the bar and have a couple drinks. I thought this would hide the pain. I accused my husband of having an affair just to make it ok to leave him. I couldn't find happiness. 6 months later I moved to my parents and told my husband he couldn't have me back until we went through marriage counseling and parenting classes. We went threw these classes and counseling sections but I still didn't believe that I deserved happiness. For the first time in our marriage we had comunnication. I slowed down my drinking at this point, but I then picked up smoking and I ate and ate. I was over weight before, but I didn't think I deserved better. I still have not bared my real pain of that night what haunts me everyday of my life and what I have a hard time living with. Did I kill a living being. I have forgiven the person who raped me, but I can not seem to forgive myself for taking that pill. There are nights that I stay awake all night long wondering.
Then there is these two addictions that went hand and hand for me smoking and working. I threw myself into my work hoping that I would cover this pain. Finding an excuses to smoke when ever I could. I didn't believe that I would be good enough for my kids. I loved them and always have loved them, but work covered my pain, so I thought. When I almost lost Mikey last year my life turned upside down. a pack of cigs a day. I was Thankful that he was saved and only hasd a few bruises. I didn't understand though Why? how does a 5 year old get hit by a F350 and live to talk about it. I realized God forgave me and my son was very blessed. I still sometime stay up and think about the awful things in my life but I don't work and I don't smoke anymore. I just eat.
My life now couldn't be any better I have two beautiful children that I am lucky enough to home school and a husband who loves me so much I am trying to look at everything in a brighter more positive light. There are those days that I don't think I deserve it and I eat. I have an addiction to Food and it haunts me. I have to get past all my past emotional beggage so that I can be healthy enough to live and see my babies grow up. How do I stop eating when does food stop being comforting. Food has been my addiction since way back and I will find any excuse to eat. I eat when I am happy, sad, lonely and when I don't deserve anything I have.
Today I am getting rid of my emotional beggage and starting my life forgiving myself for this aweful night. I do deserve life. I deserve health and I deserve happiness. I am done being a victim I want my life back. And Food will not run it. "I can do anything with the help of Christ who gives me the strength I need."(Phillippians 4:13)
I am doing this with my loving husband he and I have made a bet with each other to see who looses the most weight. We will weigh each other each week who ever loses the most get a healthy dinner prepared by the other one. I am hoping this is a new beging to my life. Every day is a new day and is a gift thats why it is called the present. Yesturday is history and tomorrow is a mystery but today is a present. I am no longer living in the past.
Friday, January 16, 2009
In Loving Memory Of Elenor P. Allen
In Honor Of Elenor Allen August 28th, 1912- January 13th,2009
Grandma Allen was a wonderful woman. She was one of a kind. She was more than just a Grandma she was a mother, sister, firend, and grandmother to everyone she meat. When I was growing up I remember her taking us shoping every year before school to get new shoes and new clothes. And then again at easter time. Several times she would make new outfits for us. She was an amaizing woman. Every Sunday she would pick us four girls up for church and take us to church. She love Family and food. That means Family get togethers. If there was something to celebrate grandma would celebrate it. everyones Birthday and whn I say eveyone I mean everyone. She would celebrate all the holidays even Mothers day and fathers day. Family was important to her. She gave tramendously to the churches food pantry. She had to make sure everyone was feed. And how many Grandmas or great grandmas do you know that will sit on the floor and play with the kids. well thats my Grandma. Know She is with God and in my heart forever and she has deffinetly made an impression on me. Thank you God for Grandma and all the wonderfull memories.
Grandma Allen was a wonderful woman. She was one of a kind. She was more than just a Grandma she was a mother, sister, firend, and grandmother to everyone she meat. When I was growing up I remember her taking us shoping every year before school to get new shoes and new clothes. And then again at easter time. Several times she would make new outfits for us. She was an amaizing woman. Every Sunday she would pick us four girls up for church and take us to church. She love Family and food. That means Family get togethers. If there was something to celebrate grandma would celebrate it. everyones Birthday and whn I say eveyone I mean everyone. She would celebrate all the holidays even Mothers day and fathers day. Family was important to her. She gave tramendously to the churches food pantry. She had to make sure everyone was feed. And how many Grandmas or great grandmas do you know that will sit on the floor and play with the kids. well thats my Grandma. Know She is with God and in my heart forever and she has deffinetly made an impression on me. Thank you God for Grandma and all the wonderfull memories.
Thursday, January 15, 2009
What if God was one of us?
PSALMS 23
The Lord is my shepherd;
I shall not want
He makes me lie down in green
pastures;
He leads me beside still waters.
He restores my soul;
He leads me in the path of
righteousness
For his name's sake.
Yea though I walk through the valley
of the shadow of death,
I will fear no evil;
For you were with me;
Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me.
You prepare a table before me in the
presence of my enemies;
You anoint my head with oil;
My cup runs over.
Surely goodness and mercey shall follow me.
All the days of my life;
And I will dwell in the house of the Lord
FOREVER.
The Beatitudes
matthew 5: 3-11
Blessed are the poor in spirit
For theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
Blessed are those who mourn.
For they be comforted.
Blessed are the meek.
For they shall inherit the earth.
Blessed are those who hunger and
thirst for righteousness,
For they shall be filled.
Blessed are the merciful.
For they should obtain mercy.
Blessed are the pure in heart,
For they shall see God.
Blessed are the peacemakers,
For they should be Called the sons of God.
Blessed are those who are persecuted
for righteousness' sake,
For theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
Monday, January 12, 2009
Are you going to heaven or hell
The other day we had a friend of ours over and he noticed all the crosses and bible verses all over our house. Not to mention the twenty different bible that I have for some research that I am doing. Well he made a coment to us " if the devil ever comes you guys wont need an excorsist". Its actually pretty funny cause the devil is already here. Its your choice to go with the devil or follow Jesus. I also said it does not matter weather you have tons of crosses or bibles or pictures of Jesus all over your home. The Question is are you living the way God wants you to live. You can have 100 bible or you can have 1 bible are you reading it and living it or are they sitting on a shelf collecting dust. That how my bibles were sitting on a shelf collecting dust. I started reading my bible by just picking it up and ready one verse or two a week then I progressed to three or four a week. But this was not enough I wanted to know what these verses meant and why I was not living the way I was supposed to. If you just read the bible and not live it that is just as bad as not reading it at all. So are you going to heaven or hell? READ THE BIBLE AND FIND OUT.
Thursday, January 8, 2009
Our God is and AWSOME GOD!
My Aunt sent this song to me a while back and the kids liked it so when we were oging through GodTube to find fun songs the kids asked me to put this on my bolg. So I happily granted their request. So what was shared with us is now being shared with you. Our God is an Awsoime God
Tuesday, January 6, 2009
Don't Worry About Anything
Don't Worry About anything instead why don't you pray. This is what I have been doing lately. I haven't worried about much. Just been livv=ing life and it's been good.
Saturday, January 3, 2009
If your going through Hell
There have been some really tough times in my past and when I felt like I couldn't get through them I always prayed or through a fit and pulled my hair out. Some times I rolled up in a ball and just cried. There were times I would blame everyone. Its ok to go through hard times. It happens. Don't give up because its hard keep going. My Aunt Shelly gave me a few words and Bible Verses about going through tough times. And I have listen to this song when going through hard times. Weather your hard time is a broken nail or a broken back just remember God is there. Don't give up on him or your self.
1 peter 5 7-11 Casting all your care upon him; for he careth for you. Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walketh about, seeking whom he may devour: Whom resist steadfast in the faith, knowing that the same afflictions are accomplished in your brethren that are in the world. But the God of all grace, who hath called us unto his eternal glory by Christ Jesus, after that ye have suffered a while, make you perfect, stablish, strengthen, settle you. To him be glory and dominion for ever and ever. Amen. The many problems and demands of this life, which the Bible calls "the cares of this world," can easily overwhelm us if we let them. We feel we must do this or that; we must plan for this or that; we must somehow deal with this or that or THIS or THAT... The Bible recognizes this situation, and the difficulties it can cause.
Mark 4:19
"And the cares of this world, and the deceitfulness of riches,
and the lusts of other things entering in, choke the word, and
it becometh unfruitful."
So what should we do when the cares of this world seem to close in on us, causing distress and confusion? WE SHOULD CAST OUR CARES ON JESUS! Jesus is our Lord and Saviour. We have given ourselves to Him, so we now belong to Him. He has been given all power in Heaven and Earth, so we should let Him take care of these things for us. We should let Him figure things out and tell us what to do. Our job is to do whatever He clearly tells us to do. His job is to arrange the big plans. We are overstepping our boundaries when we feel we have to figure everything out for ourselves.Matthew 11:29-31
"Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek
and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls.
For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light."
John 14:27
"Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as
the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be
troubled, neither let it be afraid."
Romans 14:17
"For the kingdom of God is not meat and drink; but righteousness,
and peace, and joy in the Holy Ghost."
2 Thessalonians 3:16
"Now the Lord of peace himself give you peace always by all
means. The Lord be with you all."
Philippians 4:6-7
"Be careful (filled with care, anxious) for nothing; but in
every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let
your requests be made known unto God. And the peace of God, which
passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through
Christ Jesus."
1 Peter 5:6-7
"Humble yourselves therefore under the mighty hand of God,
that he may exalt you in due time: Casting all your care
upon him; for he careth for you."
O Lord, when I feel troubled and distressed,
By all the cares and problems in this world,
I pray that You will calm my anxious mind, and give me peace within
I pray You take my cares away,
As I your servant cast them onto You.
In Jesus name I pray, Amen.
1 peter 5 7-11 Casting all your care upon him; for he careth for you. Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walketh about, seeking whom he may devour: Whom resist steadfast in the faith, knowing that the same afflictions are accomplished in your brethren that are in the world. But the God of all grace, who hath called us unto his eternal glory by Christ Jesus, after that ye have suffered a while, make you perfect, stablish, strengthen, settle you. To him be glory and dominion for ever and ever. Amen. The many problems and demands of this life, which the Bible calls "the cares of this world," can easily overwhelm us if we let them. We feel we must do this or that; we must plan for this or that; we must somehow deal with this or that or THIS or THAT... The Bible recognizes this situation, and the difficulties it can cause.
Mark 4:19
"And the cares of this world, and the deceitfulness of riches,
and the lusts of other things entering in, choke the word, and
it becometh unfruitful."
So what should we do when the cares of this world seem to close in on us, causing distress and confusion? WE SHOULD CAST OUR CARES ON JESUS! Jesus is our Lord and Saviour. We have given ourselves to Him, so we now belong to Him. He has been given all power in Heaven and Earth, so we should let Him take care of these things for us. We should let Him figure things out and tell us what to do. Our job is to do whatever He clearly tells us to do. His job is to arrange the big plans. We are overstepping our boundaries when we feel we have to figure everything out for ourselves.Matthew 11:29-31
"Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek
and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls.
For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light."
John 14:27
"Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as
the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be
troubled, neither let it be afraid."
Romans 14:17
"For the kingdom of God is not meat and drink; but righteousness,
and peace, and joy in the Holy Ghost."
2 Thessalonians 3:16
"Now the Lord of peace himself give you peace always by all
means. The Lord be with you all."
Philippians 4:6-7
"Be careful (filled with care, anxious) for nothing; but in
every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let
your requests be made known unto God. And the peace of God, which
passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through
Christ Jesus."
1 Peter 5:6-7
"Humble yourselves therefore under the mighty hand of God,
that he may exalt you in due time: Casting all your care
upon him; for he careth for you."
O Lord, when I feel troubled and distressed,
By all the cares and problems in this world,
I pray that You will calm my anxious mind, and give me peace within
I pray You take my cares away,
As I your servant cast them onto You.
In Jesus name I pray, Amen.
Its a Love Story
Romeo and Juliet is a popular William Shakespear story. It was one of my favorite stories that I learned in High School. Romeo and Juliet loved each other and because they came from two different families that did not like each other their parents kept them away from each other. At the end of the story Juliet took a poison to make her look dead and Romeo thought she was really dead and killed him self and then when Juliet woke up and saw he killed him self she killed herself. It was sad. This is not the part I like and what I am familar with. Let me tell you my love story.
I met my husband when he moved in next door to me. Our windows were by each other and we would talk out them all the time. Then I got pregnant with our daughter and the biggest issues were that I was not Catholic and he was not White. We were from two different types of families and his family wanted us to get married and my family kept telling me it was my choice. Well things got worse with the families and I had my daughter. She was my focus everything else didn't matter. When she was 18months Paul and I started talking again but everytime we did neither one of our parents liked it. We both kept getting grounded. So we moved in together so that we can be a family. And on Camilles 2nd birthday Paul says I spoke with your dad go pick out a white dress. You never have to be alone. It is a true Love story. This love story continues....................
Friday, January 2, 2009
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